Kitty Stories Monster and Friends
by IrenaAdler
Summary: Short stories about Monster and Dragon, Maine Coon cats who 'belong' to Don and his boyfriend, Will. New 3part drabble series. Third, Will is unhappy about the attempted break-in.
1. Cat

**Cat—**

"A cat?" Don said in surprise.

"Yeah," Will said. "That way there will always be someone home with the other one when one of us is working long hours. A dog would need too much attention and I've never been into birds or fish."

"I've never had a cat," Don mused. "We had a dog when I was a kid – a golden retriever mix named Archie. Actually, his name was Archimedes. Charlie is the only 5-year-old that would name a dog that. He was a good dog. Liked to chase baseballs but he always chewed on them so I went to tennis balls."

"I like dogs too," Will agreed. "But it wouldn't be fair to a dog with our crazy schedules."

"True," Don frowned thoughtfully. "But a cat … Would a cat even care if we're home?"

"Depends on the cat," Will said. "I've had four different cats and one was super clingy, one was friendly, one was indifferent, and one wouldn't let me get near him unless I was holding food."

"So it's a crap shoot?"

"Not at all," Will laughed. "Well, mine I got through neighbors leaving or a friend's new girlfriend being allergic, but you can go to the pound and actually meet them before you adopt one."

"Adopt," Don said. "Sounds serious."

Will held up his hands. "Just think about it, okay? No rush."

The next time Will was gone for a few days, Don wandered around the empty house. He had lived alone for a long time but now that he lived with someone, the silence seemed much more empty. He thought about going over to Charlie's, but he and Colby deserved whatever private time they could find. Reluctantly, he went down to the local animal shelter, just to look.

And there he met Monster.


	2. Monster

**Monster --**

Will trudged up the sidewalk, tired and grungy from four days undercover at the Los Angeles Port. He was looking forward to a shower and a long night's sleep, but mostly he was looking forward to seeing Don. It was amazing how much difference it made to have someone to come home to. And not just someone -- his wonderful, aggravating, incredible Don. His steps sped up.

Don's car was in the driveway, so he knew Don was home. Will fumbled with the door key and opened the door … then froze.

Sitting in the doorway, looking at him with interest, was the biggest cat that Will had ever seen. It was a brown tabby, with a white stomach, golden eyes, and tufted ears and feet. Will blinked at the cat and the cat blinked at Will.

Will heard Don laugh and looked up. Don was standing there in the door to the bedroom, a big grin on his face.

"Will, meet Monster," Don said. "Monster, meet Will, your other housemate."

"You got a cat?" Will asked in astonishment.

Don shrugged. "It was your idea."

"I just didn't think you'd move so fast." Will stared at the cat.

"I didn't plan to," Don said. "But I met Monster at the animal shelter and he made it very clear that he was coming home to live with us."

Will stepped inside, noting that the cat hadn't made any move to leave through the open door. Monster immediately began to brush around his legs, purring.

"He likes you," Don said with relief.

"Of course he does," Will said, reaching down to scratch Monster's head. "He knows he was my idea."

Don snorted, and Will sat on the floor and introduced himself to Monster.

"He's huge," Will said, petting Monster's thick fur while Monster rubbed his head against Will's leg.

"Maine Coon. 17 pounds."

"No wonder they called him Monster."

"Actually, they called him Fluffball. I named him Monster. He seems to appreciate the improvement in status."

"As well as the new home," Will said. "Neutered?"

"Yep."

"Litter box?"

"In the laundry room."

"Food?"

"Same."

"Does he go outside?"

"I debated keeping him just inside but Monster made it very clear that he was an indoor/outdoor cat. I even put a cat door in the back door, hope that was okay."

"Sure," Will said. "Sounds like he already has you wrapped around his paw."

"I'm a soft touch," Don shrugged. "And it gave me something to do in the evenings. I also wanted to make sure that he'd still be entertained when we're both gone." Don sat down on the chair next to Will and said, "He's funny and we just hang out. He isn't always demanding I pet him or feed him, he just likes to be around. He fetches, can you believe that?"

Will laughed. "Fetches?"

"Sure, I'll show you later." Don smiled down at Will. "I've been telling him all about you, but he insisted on waiting to pass judgment until he met you. Looks like he's decided to keep us."

Will looked at the cat and thought about the fact that he was _their_ cat. A living, breathing member of their little family. Will felt a thrill of joy go through him.

There was a slight shake to Will's voice as he asked, "Well, Monster, did you keep Don company while I was gone?"

"Yep," Don answered for him, "But not nearly well enough." Don reached down, pulled Will up from the floor and wrapped his arms around him. "Welcome home, Will," he said and kissed him deeply.


	3. Visitor

**Visitor--**

Charlie frowned as he put out another place-setting. "Someone we want you to meet," Don had said. Who could he and Will possibly be bringing to supper? Unless his social memory was wrong – which was always possible -- that sort of phrase was usually reserved for a girlfriend or similar. Considering they already had each other, who on earth could this third person be? He supposed that there could somehow be a third person added to their couplehood – he'd heard of such things …

That gave him the willies so he quickly dismissed it. He wished that Colby was back from the store so that he could discuss it with him. Colby understood people so much better than he did. _Okay, so the overwhelming majority of the world understands people better than I do._ His father would be late for dinner, so it was left to Charlie to meet this unknown person by himself. He fiddled with the paper napkins, folding them into shapes of birds.

Couldn't Don have given him a clue? What if the person was vegetarian? Charlie'd just cooked steaks and potatoes. Colby was at the store getting beer. What if this person expected wine or fancier food?

Charlie heard the sound of Will's Explorer pulling into the driveway and ran to the door. Opening it, he stared at the car, but all he could see were Don and Will. _A very small person?_

Will turned off the car, unbuckled his seatbelt and opened his door … and out jumped a cat.

Charlie pulled back in surprise, then wondered if he should try to catch the cat. The cat, however, wasn't going anywhere, just sitting on the driveway waiting for Will and Don to get out of the car.

Charlie stared at the cat. He was only using the term, "Cat," because he couldn't think of a better one. But this "cat" was the size of a medium dog and had white tufts of fur coming out of his ears and large tufted feet. His golden eyes were large, round, and fixed on Charlie.

Don came around the side of the SUV, and the cat stood up and trotted purposefully towards Charlie. Charlie found himself backing up.

"Hey, Charlie," Don called with a laugh in his voice, "Meet Monster."

"An appropriate name," Charlie murmured. The cat came up to Charlie and swirled around his legs. Charlie leaned down and carefully patted the cat's head. It accepted his pat and moved on into the house.

Charlie watched Monster sniff out the front room and then move on. Charlie turned back to Don. "You got a _cat_?" he asked. Don had never seemed like a cat person.

"Will's idea," Don said.

"He got him while I was gone," Will said, "I probably would gotten something …"

"Smaller?" Charlie said with bemusement.

"Yeah," Will said with a laugh. "He's a Maine Coon. They come large."

"And … outgoing," Charlie said, watching Monster climb the stairs to investigate the upstairs.

"Yeah, he likes to ride in the car and visit other people."

"Weird," Charlie commented. He went towards the stairs to see what Monster was doing, but the cat was already coming back down. _He probably smells dinner._

Indeed, the cat headed straight for the table and jumped up. He batted one of Charlie's folded up napkin-birds to the floor.

"Monster," Don chastised in an entirely too calm voice, "Off the table."

Monster looked up then casually jumped off the table, as if it was his own idea. He chased down the paper bird and patted it across the floor, his fluffy tail twitching. Charlie watched him dubiously. He'd never had a cat, and they always seemed like alien creatures, with even more unfathomable behavior and motivations than people.

"Why did you get a cat?" Charlie asked.

"For company," Will said. "We both work strange hours, sometimes long hours. This way there will always be someone home with the other person."

Charlie eyed Monster. "Couldn't you have gotten a dog or a … parakeet?"

Monster knocked the paper bird beneath the couch. He swiped a paw underneath the couch but couldn't reach it. He turned and began trotting towards the table, probably for another napkin-bird.

Will headed him off and pushed the couch so that the bird was visible. Monster pounced on it and it skittered off across the floor.

"I like cats," Will said.

"You would," Charlie grumbled.

Will smiled. "What's that supposed to mean?"

Charlie flushed and picked up another napkin to fold. "I just meant that I don't get cats."

"And you don't get me?" Will asked.

Charlie glanced over, but Will seemed amused rather than annoyed. "No," Charlie acknowledged.

Will's smile widened.

"Oh, don't get all puffed up," Don laughed. "Chuck here doesn't get anyone he hasn't known for ten years, and maybe not even then."

"Humph," Charlie said. "I get Colby."

"I'll bet you do," Will grinned.

Charlie blushed and mumbled that he needed to get dinner. He pushed open the kitchen door and somehow Monster was there, dashing in ahead of him.

"Hey! Your cat is in my kitchen," Charlie said accusingly.

"He won't get into anything … I hope," Don said, brushing past Charlie like Monster just had.

Charlie followed them into the kitchen to see that Monster was more interested in the back door than food.

Don shook his head. "No, I don't think the Koi would enjoy a visit. I think the pond's deep enough they can hide from you, but you might be tempted to take a swim." Monster stared at the door for a moment, his tail twitching, then headed back into the front room.

Grimacing, Charlie opened the oven door to check the potatoes. Who brings their cat to dinner?

Don handed him an oven mitt. "I should have warned you, but we thought it would be funny to surprise you. I didn't know you didn't like cats."

"I don't dislike cats," Charlie said defensively. What he hadn't appreciated was being the butt of Don and Will's joke. Charlie was very glad that Don was so happy these days, but did it have to come out as constant jokes on Charlie?

"Hey, buddy," Don said quietly. "Something wrong?"

Frowning, Charlie pulled the tray out of the oven. "Will doesn't have any younger brothers, does he?"

"No brothers at all, just two younger sisters."

"Well, it feels like he's been saving up a lifetime of little-brother teasing and you just go along with it."

Don blinked, surprised. He didn't say anything while Charlie moved the potatoes to a serving dish. Charlie picked up the dish to take it out to the table.

"Hey," Don said, putting his hand on Charlie's arm. "I hadn't realized … I'll rein him in, okay?"

Charlie nodded and started to move away.

Don stopped Charlie and made him set the dish back down. "Look. Will comes from a pretty messed up family," Don said, holding Charlie's eyes. "He doesn't know what to do with a family that talks to each other and actually likes each other. To be honest, I think we make him nervous. In Will's family, niceness and politeness are used to cover up a lot of unpleasant feelings underneath."

"Yuck," Charlie said faintly. Will's family sounded awful.

"Don't tell Will that I told you this."

"Yeah, sure, of course."

"So just give Will time, okay? And stand up to him. I think that he'd find that a relief."

"Really?" Charlie frowned.

"Definitely," Don said. "But if he's getting on your nerves, let me know, okay?"

"I do like Will," Charlie said quickly.

"Good," Don smiled, gripping Charlie's shoulder. "'Cause he's gonna be part of my life for a very long time."

Charlie nodded slowly, trying to process what Don had just told him. He'd have to talk to Colby about it. Colby might understand.

Don picked up the bowl of potatoes. "I've got this."

"Okay," Charlie said and followed Don out of the kitchen door.

Will was sitting on the far side of the room, tossing the paper bird for Monster. To Charlie's surprise, Monster was catching the paper bird and patting it back to Will for him to throw again. Will looked up. With his new knowledge, Charlie could see a flash of nervousness behind Will's dark eyes, anxiety at what Don and Charlie might have been talking about in the kitchen. Then Will blinked and it was gone.

"He fetches?" Charlie asked. "Are you sure he's a cat?"

Will smiled. "Reasonably sure, though we haven't done any genetic testing."

"You know, I remember reading something about how they're using modified feline immunodeficiency virus for gene therapy in humans."

"Feline AIDS you mean? Well, he's clean."

Charlie nodded distractedly and went back into the kitchen and through to the back porch. He got the steaks from the grill and carried them to the table. A few more trips back and forth and he had everything that he could think of for the table.

"We'll give Colby a few minutes, but not much longer since the steaks are best hot."

Charlie sat down at the table. Will got up from playing with Monster and came over to take a seat. Monster followed him.

Charlie said, "Don't tell me he eats at the table …"

"No," Don laughed. "And he doesn't beg either, which is good."

"Is he neutered?" Charlie asked. "Did you know that one female cat can produce 420,000 cats in only seven years?"

"He's neutered, Charlie," Don said and sat down.

Charlie removed the extra place-setting he'd brought for Don's mystery guest then sat down himself. He fiddled with his napkin, unsure how to embark on this new policy of 'standing up' to Will. Then he smiled. "You had to get a male cat? Don't you already have enough testosterone in that house? It must be practically dripping down the walls."

Will laughed and Don snorted.

"Figured a girl cat would drown in it," Will said.

"You said that Don got him while you were gone?"

"Yep," Will said, "Came home from four days straight sniffing out a drug connection on the docks and looking forward to taking a shower and seeing Don, or maybe both, and then I open the door and here's this big cat staring at me."

"I see," Charlie said, with mock solemnity. "So you don't mind if Don brings home strange males while you're gone."

Will's eyes widened, Don stiffened, and Charlie wondered if he'd gone too far. Before he could apologize, Will began to laugh.

Will shook his finger at Don. "I told him that if it happened again that it would be him getting neutered."

Charlie chuckled and Don relaxed.

At that moment, the front door opened and in came Colby. "Hey guys," Colby called then did a double-take when he saw Monster. Monster walked straight up to Colby and stuck his head in one of the plastic grocery bags Colby was carrying.

"Colby, this is Monster," Don said. "Our cat."

"Umm, what's he doing here?"

"Visiting," Will said. He stood up. "Give you a hand, Granger?"

Colby said nothing but didn't resist when Will took a bag from his hand. Colby was still staring at Monster.

"Monster," Don called, and Monster took his head out of the bag and looked over at Don. "Hey, Will," Don said to Will, who was going through the kitchen door. "Find Monster some milk?"

Monster's ears shot forward and he moved quickly towards Will. Will went into the kitchen followed by an eager cat, who was followed by a bemused Colby.

"Adult cats I've had would throw up if I fed them milk," Colby said as he disappeared into the kitchen.

Charlie watched him go and traded glances with Don. Will and Colby weren't the greatest of buddies, but they seemed to be fairly comfortable around each other. Wouldn't have guessed that from their first meeting …

"So Don," Charlie lowered his voice. "A joint pet. That's a big step."

Don looked surprised then thoughtful. "Yeah, I guess it is. It seemed perfectly natural, like moving into Will's place."

"Cats can live for fifteen or twenty years," Charlie said, "Though I don't know about the life expectancy of Maine Coons in particular."

"Overt signs of commitment," Don murmured to himself.

"Hmm?"

"Oh, just something Megan said."

"You talked with Megan about getting a cat?"

"Not directly, no."

"Then what—"

Don leaned closer. "So when are you and Colby shacking up?"

Charlie's mouth dropped open and he stared at Don. "We, never, I mean, we haven't, we haven't talked about it."

"Why not?" Don smiled. "I tell you that it's wonderful to have someone to come home to, someone to share a bed with."

Charlie nodded slowly. He knew how lovely it was to sleep with Colby. He'd done it for a long time, but when the nightmares began to fade … Why hadn't they talked about it? Colby probably wanted his own place, somewhere to go to get away from him ...

Charlie offered up the only argument he could think of, however weak. "What about Dad?"

"What about him?" Don asked. "I don't think he'd mind."

"Come on, don't you—"

At that moment, Will and Colby came out of the kitchen, Colby carrying a bunch of beers and Will carrying a bowl with milk in it. Monster trotted after them. Will set down the bowl and Monster's nose dove into it.

Colby opened the beers and passed them around. Charlie took his and started portioning out the steaks. Colby and Will were talking with animation about various cats that they'd had. Charlie listened closely, but didn't learn anything new about Colby's past. _Yet another thing we haven't talked about._

While Don asked Will about one of his cats, Colby touched Charlie's hand. "Everything ok?" he asked quietly.

Charlie nodded and smiled. What they had now was good – why do something that might mess it up?

Colby eyed him, like he wasn't sure to trust that smile, but he shrugged and turned back to the conversation. That was one of the many things that Charlie loved about Colby – he didn't push. There was plenty of time to deal with other things.

_Right now …_ Charlie looked over at Monster and smiled. He was a big odd cat, but he made Don happy, which is really all that mattered. Will too, in fact. It was only a bonus that both Will and Monster were growing on Charlie. He scooted back from the table and went to look for some tuna for the newest member of his family.


	4. Surprise

**Surprise—**

A scratching sound, a movement on the near side of the bed. Don's eyes snapped open … and he saw _it._

With a yelp, he scrambled away, backing into Will, landing them both on the floor on the other side of the bed, in a tangle of blankets and bare limbs. Will freed himself, rolling smoothly to his knees and pointed his gun at … Monster, who was looking hurt that his gift of a dead mouse had been rejected.

Will lowered his gun and laughed and laughed. Blushing, Don slunk out of the room to get a paper towel.


	5. Monster and the Koi

**Monster and the Koi--**

Monster circled around the Koi pond, examining all the angles of approach. Don and Charlie watched closely.

"It's better to introduce him to the pond while I'm here, instead of letting him find it on his own, because you know he will," Don said, readying himself to grab Monster if he jumped in.

"I can see what kind of parent you are," Charlie said with a sly grin.

"He's a cat, not a kid," Don protested.

"He's your and Will's _bay-bee_," Charlie said in a singsong voice that all little brothers seemed born with.

"He's nothing like a baby," Don said in irritation.

Monster took advantage of Don's distraction and slid into the pond. Monster's paws slashed through the water and the Koi scattered.

"Monster!" Don shouted. He stepped into the pond, slid, and landed hard on his ass. "Ugh," he groaned as his whole body was jarred.

He turned to find Monster. The cat was paddling around the pond, sticking his nose into the water every few strokes. His tail was thrashing around like a long-furred whip, the end still dry. Don looked for the Koi but they seemed to have disappeared. At least Monster didn't have any in his jaws just yet.

Behind him, Charlie was laughing. Don glared at him. "Give me a hand?"

Charlie stepped back. "You'll pull me in."

"There are enough of us in here already," Don snapped.

Charlie held out his hand, looking ready to let go at the slightest hint of trouble. Don grabbed it and yanked himself out of the pond, causing Charlie to stagger.

Soggy and annoyed, Don looked back at the pond. Monster was still paddling around, but from this angle Don could see that that Koi were all hidden safely under the overhanging rocks. Unless Monster was willing to dive pretty deep – and it didn't look like he was – he wouldn't be able to get to them.

Monster quickly reached the same conclusion and turned to Don, meowing a demand.

"No," Don grumbled. "I'm not going to get the fish to come up for you."

Monster's tail lashed angrily, spraying water around. Don watched him silently until he seemed to tire of swimming. He climbed out of the pond and trotted up to Don, the water streaming off his thick fur. He sat and glared up at Don.

"Mrow!" Monster said reproachfully.

"The fish were here before you were," Don replied. "I'm not going to change their pond to please you. Chase a bird or something."

Monster lifted his nose and stalked away.

"Interesting parenting technique," Charlie said snidely.

"Oh, shut up," Don said with a sigh. Usually Monster was a good buddy, but sometimes it felt like Monster was a child – a furry, energetic, obstinate child. "Just wait until you have kids."

"I don't think that I will," Charlie said quietly.

Don grimaced, remembering the slim likelihood of either of them giving dad grandkids now. He shrugged and patted Charlie's shoulder. "You could always get a dog," Don said. "Monster would love that."


	6. Monster and Nena

**Monster and Nena –**

Monster and Nena had a special bond. Since the first day they'd met, they'd been best buddies, partners in crime. Monster was a laid-back cat, but somehow kitchen messes were bigger when Monster helped Nena make cookies, and the flower bed became a war zone when Monster played 'meanie' to Nena's 'Fed.' Nena had human kid friends, but they usually preferred sports or dolls, not full-scale assaults on 'The Castle of the Evil Drug Lord.'

Nena had met many cats and knew Monster was unusual. He liked to take car trips, like to play with other cats or kids or dogs. Monster would jump out of her Uncles' car, find Nena, then they'd discuss what game they'd play. Monster usually proposed games that involved chasing something, but he was quite willing to be 'Robin' to Nena's 'Batman,' especially if the sparrows in Mrs. Singh's lemon tree were 'Penguin' and his minions. Monster's favorite was when Nena used her radio-controlled sub to stir up the Koi in their pond.

Playing with her Uncles was fun too. Uncle Will was really good at Hide-n-Go-Seek. He and Uncle Don would play catch or go roller-skating or play Candyland when Daddy and Charlie swore they never wanted to see it again. And Grandpa Alan was always willing to read her books, even ones she'd memorized, or just listen to her stories of how Rocko, her orange dinosaur, could shoot laser beams from his eyes and do math really fast.

But Monster, he never told her it was bedtime or bathtime or anything but playtime or laptime, when the big cat would fit as much as he could of himself on her lap and purr hard enough to make her teeth rattle. Monster might live with her Uncles, but she knew he was really hers.


	7. Drabble: Somebody in Need

**A/N:** This takes place a while after the other Monster stories. In my 'verse, David and Matt Li (The Asian FBI Tech on the show) are roommates.

**Somebody in Need—**

"C'mon, Don," David begged. "At least come over and meet him."

"We don't need another cat," Don said. "How'd you end up with one, anyway?"

"It started out as a joke," David said, slumping in his chair. "Matt got some tuna in case any neighborhood cats wandered into our apartment, and this cat must've heard about it, because he shows up on our doorstep the next day and won't leave."

"You start feeding him and he stays," Don said wryly. "Big surprise."

"He's a cool cat," David said, his desperation evident. "Lots of fun and doesn't mess stuff up and asks at the door when he needs to go outside instead of a litter box."

"So, why don't you keep him?"

"Matt's allergic," David groaned. "Coughing and sneezing and pretending he just has a cold."

"Maybe he _has_ a cold."

"What kinda investigator do you think I am? He's definitely allergic to the cat."

"There are animal shelters ..."

"Matt'll never agree to it. He's worried they'll euthanize him."

Don grimaced at the truth in that statement. There were too many cats in LA for any shelter to handle.

He must have looked like he was caving, because David said quickly, "He's got his shots and been neutered. He's in good shape, the vet says. … Well, she said that after removing his claws from her face. Didn't really like the vet. He was okay on the ride there and back though – he likes to ride in the car, just like your cat."

Don sighed. "Okay, no promises."

* * *

So it was that Don and Will ended up bringing their cat over to David and Matt's apartment, just "to see."

David and Matt brought their cat out to their front porch and Don and Will set down theirs.

"Monster, meet Dragon."


	8. Drabble: Working on Don

**Working on Don—**

Four men held their breath as Dragon and Monster sniffed each other. Each man had different hopes for this meeting and they waited in silence for any fireworks. After a brief flickering of ears at Monster, Dragon went straight to Don. Purring madly, he curled around Don's legs.

Will held back a smile. Dragon had known immediately which human he needed to work on. Will liked the idea of a second cat so Monster wasn't alone so much, and David was desperate to get rid of the cat and stop Matt's sneezing. Matt was obviously torn, watching Dragon through wistful, blood-shot eyes. But Don … He'd told Will and Monster that this visit was just to stop David from bugging him and that they shouldn't worry.

Monster didn't look worried at the moment. He was snuggling up to Matt in the way that any cat will do when confronted with someone who's allergic.

Dragon put his paws on Don's leg and rubbed his head against Don's hand. Don scratched his ears reluctantly. He was a beautiful, long-haired silver cat with a big ruff.

"He's in good shape. Are you sure he isn't somebody's?" Will asked.

"We asked our neighbors, put up signs everywhere, and checked out some websites," David said.

"He had bad tangles when we found him," Matt added. "We took him to a groomer who got them out and said he just needs to be brushed regularly."

"A _cat_ groomer?" Don asked. "How did he handle that?"

"Thought it great fun," David said wryly. "Baited every dog in the place."

"Sounds like Monster …"

At his name, Monster came over and stretched up Don's other leg in a perfect mimic of Dragon. Will let himself grin. It was as if both cats were begging.

_Partners in crime already._


	9. Drabble: Neutral Territory

**Neutral Territory—**

Grinning, Will took a cell phone picture of what he was pretty sure was the introduction of a new member of their family. Don looked bemused. Dragon and Monster were stretched up Don's legs, one set of giant paws on each thigh, one furry head under each hand, both purring enough to rattle Don's teeth.

Dragon was smaller than Monster, but still not small. Monster now weighed a healthy 21 pounds, having gained weight since they got him. Dragon looked like he was 15 or 16 pounds, but it was hard to tell how much was fur. Dragon definitely had some Maine Coon in him, from his size, tufted feet, and thick, soft fur. What were the odds that the cat that decided to adopt Matt and David was also a Maine Coon mix?

"They seem to get along," Don said slowly.

"This is neutral territory," Will said. "Why don't we try him at our home for a few days?"

"Just a few days," Don agreed reluctantly.

Will crouched down. "What do you think, Dragon? You wanna come visit us?"

Dragon dropped down from Don's leg, padded over and headbutted Will in the cheek. Everyone laughed.

"I think that's a yes," Matt said.

Will reached out a hand and let Dragon sniff it before he scratched him under the neck.

"He's certainly outgoing," Don said. "That's good."

Will said, "How about you guys bring Dragon over to our house? I'll make dinner. Then if it obviously doesn't work out, you can take him right home."

"Okay," Matt said sadly. Everyone but Don knew that it was only a formality. Barring a meltdown, Dragon was going to become Don and Will's.

"C'mon, Monster," Don said. "Home."

As they turned to go, David said to Matt, "What do you think about reptiles?"


	10. Drabble: New Arrivals

**New Arrivals—**

When David dragged himself into the office that morning, Don took one look at his haggard face and bloodshot eyes and said, "Damn, David, you look just like Amita did last time I saw her – but you don't have a newborn at your house."

"Actually," David said as he slumped into his chair. "I have six."

"Huh?"

David rubbed his goatee, which was not nearly as neat as it usually was. "Know how Matt's allergic to cats?"

"Ri-ight," Don said. "That's how we got Dragon."

"Well, I guess kittens don't have as much, um, allergens, and so Matt talked me into fostering kittens for the local shelter. We have six two-week-old kittens that were found abandoned."

"Kittens?" Don said with a smile. "_Six?_"

"Yeah," David said ruefully. "We have to feed them every two hours with formula from an eye dropper, keep them warm, and even, get this, massage them so they'll go to the bathroom."

"Wow," Don said. "Sounds like a lot of work. Just like a new baby."

"At least they grow up faster," David said, rubbing his eyes now. "At nine weeks, they'll go back to the shelter to get fixed then adopted."

"Seven weeks … Think you'll be able to give them back to the shelter or are you gonna end up with six cats?"

"No way," David said firmly. "I told Matt that if one of the kittens seems to be less allergy-causing than the others – some random cats are just naturally less allergenic – that we could keep _one_ but would have to get rid of it if he started having 'colds' again."

"Hey, Sinclair," Granger said heartily, giving David's shoulder a shove. "You look like crap. Been out partying all weekend?"

"Be gentle with him," Don said with a grin. "He's just adopted sextuplets."


	11. Drabble: Two Words

**A/N: This drabble has an adult joke in it. **

**Two Words—**

"Sex-what?" Colby asked.

"Sextuplets," Don laughed. "David and Matt have adopted six baby kittens. Apparently, they have to be fed every two hours."

"Wow …" Colby frowned. "So who's feeding them now?"

"Matt," David answered. "He's working from home for a few weeks – talked Perris into working full-time on that search database algorithm thing that he and Charlie cooked up."

"So it's your job to take care of the kitties while Matt sleeps at night?" Colby asked.

David shrugged. "Pretty much."

"When do you sleep?"

"Um, in between feedings."

"That can't be good," Don said. "You're not getting your REM sleep or whatever."

"It's not for long," David said. "Matt picked them up early Friday morning. They'll only be on the every two hours feeding for a little while then we can go to every four hours then four or five times a day."

"Let me guess," Colby grinned. "Matt talked you into it. He just looked at you with those big eyes, said 'Please, David' and you caved."

"You know," Don said to Colby, just loud enough for him and David to hear, "It's always the players that fall the hardest."

"Dude," Colby grinned. "You are so wrapped around his little finger."

"I am not," David said huffily.

"Yes, you are," Colby and Don chorused then laughed.

"Oh, so it was _your_ idea to get a second cat," David said to Don, then turned on Colby. "And you sometimes act like a mother to your absent-minded genius."

"I do not!" Colby protested.

"You do," Don said. "Because otherwise he'd be wandering the city, naked and mumbling to himself."

Colby snorted. "Maybe you're right."

"God," Don groaned. "What happened to us?"

"Two words explain it," David said.

"'True Love'?" Colby said.

"Nope," David's teeth flashed in a grin. "Morning Sex."


	12. Drabble: Old Cats and New

**Old Cats and New—**

"Hey, Nena would love to help you with the kittens," Colby said.

"Are you crazy?" Don asked. "She'll want to keep all of them."

"Not if she understands that they aren't available," Colby said, then added with a wink towards Don, "Besides, it already feels like we have two cats."

"They aren't over that often!"

"I think Nena believes that they're her cats."

"Humph," Don said grumpily. It wasn't his fault that Monster and Dragon considered the Eppes house part of their territory, just connected via car. Territory that needed to be patrolled.

"Umm, it wouldn't be a good idea for Nena to help with the kittens, anyway," David interjected.

"Why not?" Colby said, bristling. "If I say that she can resist—"

"I didn't mention that we started with seven," David said quietly.

Colby blinked. "Oh?"

"Yeah, one died on Saturday, and there's another that we don't expect to make it through the day today. Kittens without their mother have a high mortality rate, especially ones that started out as poorly as these guys. I think there were actually ten in the original litter."

Colby grimaced. "You're right. I wouldn't want to subject her to that."

"It's one of the hazards," David said unhappily. "They warned us to expect it. We'll be lucky to end up with three or four when we're done."

"Ouch," Don said. "I wouldn't want to subject _me_ to that."

"It's been harder than I thought it would be," David admitted. "You get attached to them quickly. But we're not even naming them yet. Their feeding chart and bottles just say 'One' through 'Seven' – it was 'Six' that died Saturday."

"Bummer," Colby agreed.

"Hey," David said with deliberate lightness. "Think I can get paternity leave?"

"If I have anything to say about it," Don promised.


	13. Drabble: Meal Time

**Meal Time—**

The mesmerizing pop rhythms of Splashdown wound through the room, flowing along with the characters on the large LCD computer monitor. Matt's fingers danced over the keyboard, bringing a complex SQL statement to life.

A soft bong sounded as the message 'Feeding Time!' flashed on his screen.

Sighing, Matt finished the rest of the line he was typing then sat back and stretched. At least this made him take regular breaks, something he often forgot in the heat of the flow. David had gotten on his case more than once for not eating when working.

Matt looked down at the covered basket under the desk. It was a good thing the kittens didn't mind noise, because Matt wasn't sure he could program without music. Pushing his chair back, Matt stood and did a few more stretches. It had been too long since he'd been to the dojo, also.

Yawning, he wandered down to the kitchen and began preparing the formula. Once the bottles were prepared and warmed, he wrapped them in a towel and carried them upstairs.

Trying not to jostle the bottles, Matt sat cross-legged on the floor in front of the basket.

He reached out his hand … then hesitated. It had been too recently that he'd opened the basket to find Four cold and dead, curled into the far corner of the basket, his littermates all as far from him as possible. It didn't matter that Matt thought it was coming.

Clenching his jaw, he pulled back the blanket.

They were all still warm, still alive. The kitten called One was already lifting her white head with its one black ear, knowing she was first for feeding. She made a chirping noise and the rest of the kittens began to stir.

"Okay, guys," he smiled. "Meal time."


	14. Drabble: Five Names

**Five Names –**

Matt hadn't planned on naming the kittens – he wasn't keeping them, after all – but names began to creep in as they grew more active and showed individual personalities. The kitten called One became Alpha, since she was a little pushy and a good five ounces heavier than the rest. She was all white but for one black ear, one black paw, and a few spots of black on her back and tail.

Two was a tabby that liked to pounce on anything that moved, including human feet, vacuum cleaners and images on the TV. She became Hunter. But in her quiet moods, she was Cuddles, because she loved to be petted and sit on any lap available. If none was, she'd sit on any body part she could, even if she had to use claws to stay there.

Grey male Three became Digger, for his enthusiastic digging in the litter box, even when he wasn't using it. He also burrowed under couch cushions, clean laundry, and David's piles of FBI paperwork.

Number Five, another tabby, became Mortimer, since he seemed like a librarian, studying the world with great attention, but always from a safe spot.

Number Seven turned into Shadow. The tiny runt liked to hide, and since he was all black, was very good at not being located for a while. But when Matt woke up, he'd often find Shadow curled up in the hollow of his neck, Shadow's little body barely registering as weight.

As the kittens grew older, Matt began to sniffle and he started on a prescription antihistamine. That seemed to help, but as the kittens neared their ninth week, and their return to the shelter, it got worse and David began giving him that stern look.

Soon the kittens were going to have to go.


	15. Drabble: Problem Solver

**Problem Solver—**

"We can't just let them go!"

"I knew this would happen," David snapped.

"I know we can't keep them," Matt said, wiping his nose. "I just can't stand them being in a little cage, hoping someone will notice them before they get put to sleep."

David put his arm around Matt, carefully avoiding squishing kittens. "They're _not_ going to be put to sleep."

"They have to, sometimes. There's too many cats. At least these guys won't be making more unwanted cats. But if they don't get adopted …"

"Matt," David said firmly. "There's no way we saved these guys' lives to let them get euthanized."

"But –"

"Hey, we're FBI," David squeezed Matt's shoulder. "We help people and solve problems. We can figure this out."

Matt gave him a small smile. "Between my brains and your brawn?"

"How about your brawn and my brains?"

"Scary thought," Matt shot back, his smile widening.

"I've got another thought," David said, detangling himself from Hunter's claws and pulling Digger out from beneath his T-shirt.

Free from those two, he wrestled Alpha for his phone and rescued Mortimer from a precarious perch. He was really going to miss these fuzz balls, but a healthy Matt was more important.

After a long phone call, involving lots of hold music and rerouting, David stroked Shadow who had curled up on his lap and turned to Matt.

"Okay, the rescue group is happy for us to find homes for the kittens, but all adopters will have to be screened by them. The kittens won't even have to go back to the shelter except to get fixed. But we need to find them homes _immediately_, so they can leave here"

"Okay," Matt mumbled, snuggling Cuddles.

David gave a relieved nod. "Now … know anyone who needs a kitten?"


	16. Drabble: Kittens for Sale

**Kittens for Sale—**

So began a campaign the likes of which the Los Angeles FBI Field Office had never seen. Matt and David had five kittens that they were determined to see placed in good homes. Anyone who showed interest was vetted as thoroughly as a Secret Service applicant.

They started with close friends. Charlie and Colby reluctantly turned down a kitten. With Nena in school and Alan working, there was no one to take care of a kitten during the day. They were warned, on penalty of flogging, _not _to take the question directly to Nena.

Don and Will said they'd already rescued a cat from David and Matt and two cats were plenty.

Megan said she'd like to, but thought that Larry would find a 'domestic dependant' too much of a commitment.

Thus they turned to the rest of the field office.

Mortimer went to Santos, a tech who watched the world with the same studying expression as the kitten.

Agent Jackson took Alpha – or rather Alpha took Agent Jackson, bullying her way into his heart. The normally-jovial agent quietly told David she was the first family he'd had since he'd lost his son.

Digger found a place with Monte, the building's security guard, who turned out to be an avid gardener and messy housekeeper.

Hunter aka Cuddles went to the office admin with three active kids.

Finally, there was just one left – Shadow. As Matt lay in bed, he wracked his brains for any stones he'd left unturned. It had to be the right place, someone who could appreciate the tiny, timid kitten. As the runt, Shadow had been given the longest odds to survive, but he'd just hung on.

The next morning, Matt woke to find Shadow curled up against his neck. And realized he wasn't sniffling at all.


	17. Drabble: Interrupted Nap

(Part 1 of 3)

**Interrupted Nap –**

The first thing that Don was aware of was Dragon patting his face. With his claws. Don grumbled, an act made difficult by the fifteen pounds of Maine Coon sitting on his chest. It was the middle of the afternoon and he was at home, in bed. He'd finally fallen asleep after being forcefully sent home, after 70 hours straight on a difficult case. It had taken him forever to get to sleep, images of their serial bomber filling his mind, but he finally had. Now one of his normally laid-back cats was waking him up.

"Dragon, what the—"

Don froze.

The cracking-breaking sound came again.

Don sat up slowly and Dragon jumped off. Don grabbed his gun and cellphone and crept towards the sound. It was coming from a little-used bedroom and was definitely breaking glass. No one was in the room, but he could see movement through the curtains. He turned and went out the front door, then slipped into the backyard.

Around the corner Don saw what had to be the two dumbest wannabe burglars ever. In broad daylight, they had broken part of a double pane window and were trying to pry it out with their bare hands. They were leaving clear fingerprints and even a little blood. Don lowered his gun and stared at them in disgust. _Definitely not pros_. They were young white guys with shaved heads, T-shirts and shorts, and they were letting Don stand here and watch them. They were so focused on their work that neither was acting as lookout. Don had no idea what they were hoping to find inside – if they managed to get through the window without slicing off a finger – but they didn't even have a bag.

Disgusted and annoyed, Don snapped, "What are you _doing_?"


	18. Drabble: Wannabe Burglars

(Part 2 of 3)

**Wannabe Burglers –**

At Don's voice, the two wannabe felons jerked in surprise and dropped more glass. Then they tried to run past him, towards the open gate. Don automatically put out his left arm and clothes-lined one man. The other kept running – only to stop short when confronted by a snarling, hissing Monster. The twenty-pound Maine Coon was puffed up to an incredible size, his tail alone bigger than the man's leg. The man stumbled back. Don grabbed the back of the man's T-shirt and threw him to the ground.

They started to get up again and Don raised his gun. "Freeze!"

The men looked at him, then towards the gate and freedom. They probably thought he was some random homeowner who kept his gun in a box in the closet.

"It's loaded," Don snapped, gesturing with the gun. "And I do know how to use it."

Don held the gun trained on them while dialing the phone with his other hand. Monster prowled closer and the men shrank back. Dragon came up behind Monster, but instead of joining in the threatening, Dragon just sat down, like he was entertained by the tableau.

A voice answered the phone and Don said, "Hello? I'd like to report a break-in at the house of a federal agent – _two_ federal agents." The men turned pale and Don smirked at them. "I don't know how you picked our house, but wrong house, guys. _Wrong_ house."

He shook his head. "Just be glad my husband wasn't home."


	19. Drabble: Evening Debrief

(Part 3 of 3)

**Evening Debrief–**

As they sat on the couch that evening, Will said, "You were far too casual with those guys."

Don snorted. "If you'd seen these guys … the biggest danger was that I'd fall down laughing and cut myself on the glass."

"Well," Will frowned. "It could have been a setup for something bigger."

"True, they could have been paparazzi, and it was all a setup to snap pics of me in my boxers."

"Don …"

"Okay, okay, but it was hard not to take it like a joke. I mean, what were they after? Your books? My old baseball junk?"

"They were probably hoping for something like cash or small electronics."

"They would have been disappointed. The only really nice electronics we have is the plasma TV – and that's bolted to the wall. Both of our laptops go to work with us. Sorry, but you and I are not good burglary targets."

Will started to smile. "There's my pans …"

Don chuckled. "They did cost an arm and a leg, but these guys wouldn't have known them from Dollar Store aluminum."

"_You_ wouldn't know them from Dollar Store aluminum."

"Hey, I'm learning!"

"True." Will frowned again. "I always thought this was such a nice neighborhood."

"It _is_. One random break-in doesn't change that."

"It was just a freak chance that you were home. Maybe we should think about getting an alarm system."

"Naw …" Don looked over at the two cats in their cat beds on the floor. Dragon was lying on his belly, his legs tucked under him and his head stretched out. Monster was lying on his back, his four paws up in the air. They were both snoring.

Don grinned. "No need. If I hadn't had been home, the cats would have just taken care of it."


End file.
